London – Day 26 of lockdown

I’m having a day of becoming trapped in thought loops. And not the good kind. I’m doing what I can to distract myself – listening to music and dancing about. I went out for my daily allotted exercise. In Dulwich Park they’ve now taped all the park benches to prevent people sitting. Clearly my local council is getting serious on the ‘no sitting’ in the park rule.

And I’m torn. On the one hand, I know why the park benches have been taped up. On the other, in the part of my brain that keeps repeating lines from Queen’s ‘I want to be free’, I realise that so much of what I took for granted I no longer can. Every walk, while important, is filled with constant focus on where I am in relation to others. The new ‘normal’.

More widely, things are getting desperate.

In the US in some states there are protests calling for an end to lockdown. From what I can see in the media, lots of people demonstrating crowded together. Some may be there because they’ve lost jobs. Others seem angry they can’t see their hairdresser or go to their local garden centre. Others because of the firmly held belief that the state is overreaching. In the UK, and Australia, the relationship of citizens to the state is viewed differently.

In the UK, NHS bosses have asked doctors and nurses treating patients infected with Coronavirus to work with flimsy plastic aprons rather than in full length waterproof plastic gowns as supplies are running out. More than 50 frontline health and care workers have already died. Others are separated from their families, fearful of infecting them if they become infected themselves.

An NHS nurse working in A&E, Kate, has hit out at Matt Hancock, Secretary of State for Health and Social Care. Her 8 year old begging and sobbing for her to not go into work. ‘I don’t want you to die’.

And many more deaths. Between 9am yesterday and 5pm yesterday, another 888 deaths in hospitals in the UK, bringing the total to 15,464. I’m not sure why the figures don’t extend to 9am today. Are we nearing the peak? Do we even know what’s really happening when testing numbers are still so low, and deaths don’t include those in care homes or those dying at home?

Getting the data right is critical and we’re nowhere near where we need to be on establishing any sense of the real level of community transmission. I can’t see how any thought can be given to relaxing lockdown until we have a more accurate set of figures and know that we’re seeing a decline. I remember when globally the figures were under 80k for those who had tested positive, and more than half this number had recovered. We’re now close to 2,275k with about 25% who have recovered. There’s a long way to go yet.

I’m not sure what’s really happening in the rest of the world. I don’t have the headspace to follow too much news.

On my walk, in a momentary escape from my thought loop, I had an epiphany. In the bigger scheme of things, there’s not much I can do except stay at home. At an individual level, I’m going to reach out a little more. I miss having random chats, getting to know people I’ve only come across in social media land, of catching up with folks at events. I used to go to quite a few events, work related ones which are critical when self-employed. Topics covered included things like data and ethics, artificial intelligence, health and care, the built environment. Webinars aren’t the same. So yes, I’m crafting an experiment and reaching out. Who knows, perhaps in some of the chats we can talk about something other than this bloody virus.

So that’s it for Day 26. Stay safe, stay well, and stay home!